Monday, June 23, 2008
Anniversary of Greater Life
Today we remember that one year ago, Dad moved to a greater life in Christ. I still remember the moment when I saw him take his last breath and very peacefully it was over. No more sorrow or pain for him, but for those of us who remain, there has been quite the opposite. We have been recounting the last year as the fastest and yet the slowest year. Each week, the pain remains. It feels as if the hurt should become lighter as time goes on, but the reality is that as time goes on, I miss him more. I miss him calling, just to see what I am doing. I miss talking to him about the latest project I am working on. I miss his constant reminder that life is short, so don't worry about everything being perfect. I miss the fact that he could never meet Juliana. She will never know his laugh or the love he had for her before she was born. She will never know that she could have him wrapped around her finger. This is the hurt that remains.
There was a time before Dad got leukemia that I was concerned about his walk with God. Little did I know that the Lord would take Dad through an intense boot-camp in his trial. Dad left us with a legacy that God is Sovereign. I remember talking to him on the phone and him saying that he was not worried about his illness or his future because he believed that God's plan was best. Many tireless nights Dad spent in the Word because his medication would not allow him sleep. It was through that time that God showed him the greatness of his salvation and perfect rest we have in Christ.
Today I pray:
Thank you Lord for giving me a father who was not perfect, but always taught me love, responsibility, leadership, hard work, and that the world doesn't owe me anything. Thank you that he not only knew you as Savior, but now he knows You in your presence. Thank you for the strength and faith you have given my family to persevere in this trial. Your grace is sufficient and my heart will chose to say, "Lord blessed be your name!"